What Running Makes of Me

"There is no substitute for finding out one's own self, for the personal revelation, for knowing first hand...When I run that happens. The body and the spirit become one. Running becomes prayer and applause for me and my Creator. When I run, I am filled with confidence and the faith that word contains. I can face unanswerable questions, certain that there are answers."

George Sheehan, This Running Life

There is a bend in the West Mississippi River Road just southeast of Downtown Minneapolis. When you head south, the path plunges down over 100 feet of vertical elevation over the course of a third of a mile. The road and accompanying recreational trails pass under the iconic arches of the I-35W bridge that provide motorists passage over the river gorge. As you run along this section of the "Grand Rounds Parkway", it feels like crossing into a new time and space. Though it is over a mile from the origin point of most of my runs, this unintended gateway is truly where my running begins.

The hill provides a dramatic divide between a bustling downtown metropolis and what feels like a separate part of the world. When my legs reach the bottom of the hill, my stride evens out in stark contrast to the choppy steps a long downhill necessitates. With a few final adjusted breaths, my aerobic system, muscles, and frame unite and I'm simply running. Momentarily, after another quarter or half a mile, running begins its work. By the two mile point, before a gradual uphill section rises to meet one of my favorite bridge crossings in the Twin Cities, running has revealed what's truly on my mind.

By the top of the Franklin Avenue Hill, my running has become the truth. All of the things I am at the top of the hill are a reality. The stretch of the achilles, gastrocnemius, and soleus are real. The onset of lactic acid accumulation initiated by my pace is a true or false test of physical exertion. The most pressing issues in my soul and mind have come to the front and I am the sum total of my physical, spiritual and emotional parts.

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Over the years I've paged through a few of history's renowned theologians, philosophers, and thinkers. Kierkegaard, James, Nietzsche, the Greeks, the Romans. reformers, scholastics, romantics, theosophists. Nihilists, positivists, fascists, communists, and republicans. Generals, poets, pastors, professors, farmers, and naturalists. Criminals, heroes, and the editorialists in the local mullet wrapper tribune.

Too much. My mind is only capable of so much inquiry before the questions disable any return on investment. The time required for digestion requires to much space in actual time, of which all thinkers recognize we have so little. Though I continue to seek, the place I've been given to find is while the minutes and miles pass during my time on the run.

There is a point during every run where I am fully all of the parts of my being. I am more than my patellar tendonitis or problems at work or how to potty train my toddler but those things are a part of my experience. And experience tells me the run will come to completion in fine form. Without always knowing it the run has been a prayer to my creator and a celebration of all the things within my current experience. 

As Dr. Sheenan is quoted above, during my run I am a fully discovered self. According to my beliefs and convictions, I see it as a place where an eternal, holy and wise God communicates himself to me. Of course, I recognize that is a statement of inherent faith.

But regardless of spiritually, there remain few things more real than what running has made of me. Every day I head out for a run there will be a moment of honest clarity where the truth is known if only for that moment at the top of hill on the Mississippi River Gorge.

The Role of Group Think For Runners

With the onset of June and July, my summer contract allows for more time to read and write and I hope to post a more thorough entry on the work of George Sheehan. I'm currently coming to the end of This Running Life,  as usual, there is no way to comment on every idea Dr. Sheehan covers that provokes a thought. 

When someone spends an hour a day for most of four decades out on the roads, a fellow runner of any experience can understand the sheer volume of deep thought that is accumulated. Many people today don't feel the same connection to Dr. Sheehan that they did a few years ago but I hope to write on why I feel a connection to his writing later this summer.

For now, I'll just make a quick attempt at processing his thoughts on group think or the herd mentality. In the final section of the book 'The Spirit' and within chapter 17 entitled 'The Self' the good doctor makes an interesting commentary.

But all too soon, we become members of the herd. We learn herd rules, herd regulations, herd mentality, herd ethics. We become part of society. Society must be preserved, so we accept the obligations it imposes.

Others have raised questions about this necessity. "Are we sent here," asked Thoreau, "to do chores and hold horses?" The answer, says society, is yes. Work has to be done. And if work is not available, then make work has to be devised. We must be kept busy. The idle mind begins to think, the idle body begins to play, and that is dangerous for the herd.

In consideration of this line of thinking, it's probably necessary to concede that the decades since Sheehan wrote many things, including the internet, have dramatically altered society as is generally referenced here. Nonetheless, there is something in this worth exploring today.

In general, my nature is skeptical, questioning and doubtful of someone who attempts to lob grenades at long established ideas that have stood the test of time. I think some of those ideas would fall under what Sheehan considers "the herd" mentality. One of the best gifts graduate work gave me was new desire to occasionally evaluate the merit of someone clearly trying to upset the applecart.

It's fair to say that Dr. Sheehan isn't one of those grenade tossers nor is he trying to challenge convention in a revolutionary form. For me, though, this section of logical progression immediately caused what would be a fast-forward moment to today for George if he was still alive.

Today I think we've actually explored the opposite extreme of escaping the herd. The new groupthink ethic is probably rooted in the post, post-modern mindset that I'm very unqualified to comment upon. But it seems that either everyone wants to believe in their ultimate solitary uniqueness or simply have everything charted on a master calendar and simply be responsible for checking a box.

The Brave New world has two polar extremes. One where every man is, in fact, an island or one where internet search engines have replaced rationality. Again, I'm not qualified to make commentary on the philosophical, ethical or moral nature of this discussion. But where it rubs up against the world of running and coaching it's my responsibility to comment.

First, let me say I completely agree that running is an individual sport and it means many things to many people. What each person brings in the form of mental, spiritual, social and physiological status must be acknowledged. Once size does not fit all.

Yet, what are we missing when we come into the game believing that our unique situation provides us the leverage to ignore history? In my opinion, we do have obligations to society to be the best versions of ourselves as runners and people.

That means my own skeptical nature has to be wielded as a tool and not as an internet firewall. I must be willing to integrate my own experience and knowledge with that of the experience and knowledge of the past and present.

The herd has survived. There is a benefit to the herd. But I think we will all be better off if everyone does the work of learning our history, evaluating new information and allowing that knowledge to educate our action each day.

Is work either "tend the horse and draw water" or "devised make work"? I say work is what you make of it each day. Just as the debate on "junk miles" will never be settled among distance runners, miles are what you make of them. 

It's our responsibility to understand what work we're doing each day we lace 'em up and get out the door. The running herd crosses a lot of finish lines in increasingly faster AND slower times. More runners are hitting a Boston Marathon qualifying time yet the average finishing time of marathons in the US is getting slower.

It's up to you to know what works and doesn't as you attempt to reach your own personal finish line each day.

The War on My Timeline

As a kid I remember riding in the car and pulling up beside beat up old trucks or mini vans or station wagons completely covered with bumper stickers. I was too young to understand the metaphors or puns or even some of the language being used. But somehow, I intrinsically knew the driver was passionate about something. There was a marked intensity that was palpable even if I had no understanding.

Fast forward to today. Grab your phone. Hit Facebook, Twitter or even Instagram. I'm right back at the window of my family's minivan looking out at a nearly indecipherable world of e-bumper stickers.

The truth is we're not more or less opinionated than we were 20, 30 or 50 years ago. We just have more access to information and more square footage to cover with sticky sided vinyl. Yet, despite more perceived awareness and the availability of more potential platforms to inform, it feels my corner of the world is more divided than ever before. And according to every thing else I can find, the rest of the nation feels that way too.

It feels like a war on my timeline and I'm struggling to figure out where to engage. I've posted about sport and it becomes a war zone about the politics of socioeconomics. I've posted about ministry to various at risk segments of society and it becomes a war zone about theology or race relations. 

Have we lost the ability to ignore the things that don't deserve our time? Have we lost the ability answer legitimate questions without hostility? Is there a way to stand for beliefs, knowing you'll upset the cart, without the sole intention of creating hostility?  

I know there has to be a fight and change requires anger, division and most likely rage. I'm an endurance sport coach and athlete so I am fully aware that washing yourself clean through the tides of pain and struggle is both necessary and often healthy.

I'm just not sure social media bumper stickers are any more effective than the polyurethane plastered to the rusty bumpers and rounded glass of AMC Pacers in 1987. 

And yes, my car is covered with bumper stickers, too.